3 Months

I've become an even worse blogger since becoming a mommy than I was before and I sucked before...I figured I'd be able to keep up with at least weekly ones but as we see I missed week 10, 11, 12, 13 and now he's officially 3 months as of yesterday.

Time goes so fast and I truly could not ask for a better baby...Zander is just a joy...I love him so much and pretty much everything he does...he is getting good at rolling...he plays with his toys...he smiles and coos and just loves daycare...he just could not be any better...I need to get my butt into gear and get pics off my phone and developed and some posted here...obviously anyone who still checks this probably is a facebook friend so I'm sure you've seen pictures....but once I get in gear i'll post a blog dedicated to his pics...

Maybe instead of this I'll do that now...hmmm but I gotta fill out daycare homework...I'll do that while my phone is downloading...tata for now

Brandy

Belated 9 weeks

We had a busy weekend that I was late on the 9 week blog...Friday his 9 week birthday he had his 2 month dr appt....he had to get 3 shots and a oral vaccine...the dr appt took forever...literally waited 45 mins b/w seeing the dr and the nurse coming in to give the shots...luckily my little guy is an angel and was soooo good and took a nap while waiting...here is a pic of him at the drs

How handsome is he??? lol

Well he was doing good with the shots took a nap after eating when we got home and seemed like his usual self until he wasnt...now in regular baby terms Zander at his worse is another baby's good day...but he was a laughing and cooing then he just started crying...like he knew something wasnt right and he didnt know why....I felt so bad...I decided to give him a bath cause it was close to his normal time and he had calmed down and enjoyed his bath...as soon as I took him out the crying started again...it broke my heart...I threw a diaper on him and didnt have the heart to try to dress him and swaddled him in a blanket gave him some medicine and just cuddled him till the medicine kicked in...luckily by the morning he was all better and well rested...

Saturday was visiting day...he meet his other grandma...that was slightly awkward but went well...she was very happy to see him and he seemed to like them...they got him so cute outfits for christmas...after that we went out to see Brit, her parents Jack and Lucy, and Zanders dad...and yes you read that correctly....he met his father for a 2nd time in his life...and yes it was not at his own parents house...Zander and I went to his parents house ourselves while he was hunting at Brit's parents house...I'm still not sure if he knew ahead of time or not that Zander and I were going there...his mother made it seem like she hadn't told him but I'm pretty sure his brother would of told him regardless...

He seen Zander for a little bit and then went back to hunting...which I was thankful for cause it was just all awkward...I didnt know if he wanted to hold him or if he was afraid to ask or I was to hand him over...he held him for a bit but seemed like he just didnt know what to do...gosh we have this whole situation so messed up that I dont know how to make it better and like I've said before not sure I care too...I'm happily raising Zander on my own...

So on a brighter note here are so cute pics of my little man...

He's learning how to grab things...watch out hair

He was smiling when I went to snap it by the time it captured it he had a pout

 

 

Brandy

2 Months!!!

My little guy is a whole 2 months old today...and boy he's getting big...cant wait for his dr appt on friday to see how big he really is...as you seen he has mixed emotions about getting older lol...i was trying to get pics of his head so i have one to develop for his monthly picture frame but he didnt want to really cooperate...so when i get them developed to do i'm sure month 2 will be funny...Alright I gotta get to bed I'll catch up more about our week on the weekly blog...talk to ya then

8 weeks

My little one hit the 8 week mark today...in a few more days he'll officially be 2 months old...he also made it thru his first week of daycare...I think he had an easier time of it than I did...by the end of the week he seems like he acts like his usual self with them as he would for me...so I'm glad and they do seem to take very good care of him...

He was being a stinker and wouldn't stop a moving around hitting himself in the face to get a good pic of him...this was the best I could do

I figure I'll throw in one from yesterday that I just love

He just looks so cute cuddled in his boppy.  But look how big he is getting...makes so sad yet happy seeing him grow up...he slept thru the night for me last night too...he is just a little angel...now I am just waiting for him to roll over...I better not miss it and he does it at daycare cause that will break my heart...

Monday was hard for me...I cried most of the way to work...gave myself enough time to calm down so my eyes weren't completely red and puffy...I couldn't even look at his pictures at work without wanting to cry...luckily I had picked a day when most ppl weren't at work so talking about him was a minimum...I just felt like a horrible mom for having to leave him there...granted I'd be a far worse mother if I didn't have a job and no money to take care of him...and ppl say its harder to leave them at a daycare than with family or friends...I don't think that's true cause I'd feel just as horrible if not worse cause its still someone but me taking care of my baby...

Monday and Tuesday he looked so tired when I picked him up...which he didn't nap that well but by Weds he seemed to be getting the hang of it and Thurs and Fri seemed like his self when I picked him up...he hasn't given me any trouble at home and it doesn't seem like his patterns are getting messed up...and so far my fears of him ending up with a diaper rash from not being changed or left in dirty clothes have not happened...I get a paper with all his feedings, naps and diaper changes and I've already had to bring in new extra clothes cause he had went thru all his just as he would of at home...so those fears are thus far unfounded...alright I don't know what Im celebrating I should of been in bed already...night all

7 weeks

A day behind on the posting but don't worry the pics are from yesterday :-)  He's getting so big and has discovered he his hands and that he can fit a majority of his fist in his mouth...he also realized there is a mirror above his swing and will lay there and look at himself and make noises and stick out his tongue...he's so silly

He's telling me a story or at least looks like it...

I still don't know how I'm gonna make it thru the day on Monday...I don't even think its sunk in yet that were gonna have to wake up, get ready, and go to daycare and work...I'm trying to get him ready...figuring out what I need to get and trying not to overpack so they don't think I'm a complete psycho...you think a snowsuit is overkill??? They say they take them outside whenever possible and though I don't think kids that young need to go for a walk I doubt they'll change that policy for me...so I'd rather know that he has something warm to wear there if they do...ugh...okay don't wanna think about this anymore...so off to get a piece of pie!

Brandy

Something to be Thankful For

I'm not one to list out what I'm thankful for just cause its Thanksgiving...but this year I decided to throw it out there and say I am so thankful for Zander...

I always thought I never really wanted kids cause I liked doing what I wanted when I wanted too...but now I happily revolve my world around this little person and what he wants and needs...I really didn't think you could love something so much...

I sometimes think I'm crazy cause I think he was suppose to be mine...obviously he grew inside me...but I really think regardless if I had choose a different path in life somewhere that he still would be here...cause he was meant for me...

Of course this day was just a good one to take pictures of the munchkin and of little Makayla too...no children were harmed or actually hit in the taking of these pictures...

Happy Thanksgiving

I got a turkey on my butt

Get off my boppy!!!

This is what you get for elbowing me

There both so cute and side by side they look like they could of been twins...though I maybe a little bias but I have the better baby :-)

6 weeks

Today Zander turned 6 weeks...where has the time gone...it makes me sad on how it goes so fast...he's cooing and smiling and sticking his tongue out...its exciting to see all those things and at the same time it means he's growing up...

His Christmas pics were taken today...he was good...no smiles though just his cute chubby cheeks and non descript smirk...as you see in the pic below he looked handsome and does well with shoes on his feet...but he's not exactly thrilled...yet that didnt stop me from spending too much money...when they are uploaded online if you'd like the link let me know and I'll give it to you...also if you'd like a christmas card with his precious face on it then give me your address and I'll send you one...either private msg me on facebook or text me or comment here and I'll get your info...

Here's another pic for his 6 weeks...he either looks like he is a cheerleader or a little mexican saying ole...love that little face

On to other matters...this whole daycare thing is breaking my heart...I just can't stand the thought of strangers raising him for all those hrs while I'm at work...I mean they were all nice and seemed to be very good with the kids that were there...but nothing is good enough for my baby if its not me and I can't convince my mom to quit her job...

My mom keeps telling asking me why I waited till last minute...which I didn't or else I'd have no place for him to go...but there is no one I know who can watch him or they live out of the way since work is already so far away...I guess I just really didn't think I'd be this attached and it wouldn't be a problem to drop him off...but I already hated being there and hate the thought of it...I just wanna be with him...

Not to mention the price of daycare is ridiculous...I'm essentially working to pay for him to be in daycare...the only way i'll be able to swing this long term is if the program they have at work is able to help pay for some of it...or I get a super big promotion...its all just too much...

Of course there is always the issue of getting child support...but I honestly just don't know if I want that...obviously the little bit of money would help but I don't want to share him...I guess and I maybe wrong but having no father consistently I think is better than having one inconsistently...I can't stand the thought of promises being made and not kept and his heart being broke when I can prevent it...and maybe I'm assuming he'd treat his son the same way has he treated me and pretty much everyone...but at the rate he's acted I'm assuming correctly

I just love him so much and want to do the best I can for him...when I read or hear on the news about ppl hurting their babies I just don't understand how they do it...what kind of monster are you if you can look at something so sweet and innocent and harm it in anyway...

I also don't know how ppl can just walk away from their kids and not care...and I dont mean adoption...but those who let anyone and everyone watch them and they just go on about their lives like its nothing...I have no desire to go out without him...if I can't bring him I don't wanna be there...I think I've been away from him for a total of 4 hrs this whole time and it wasn't even all at once...and I didn't like it...I'm his mommy I want to be the one there when he cries or just want cuddled...which obviously is why I'm so upset about the previous daycare topic...

Well since I came full circle and have myself upset again but feel slightly better venting I'm gonna call it a night...gots lots of more thinking to do...

Brandy